Injustices Abounding

In this post I am going to attempt to share more of my thoughts and feelings about the things I am seeing and experiencing so far in Africa. I realize that the majority of this blog has been dedicated to recounting stories so far. I have been receiving emails and messages recently asking things like, "But how do you feel about all of it?" and "How are you doing, really?" I will assume the people voicing these questions aren't the only ones with these, or similar, questions.

I must say that the biggest reason I haven't talked so much about my thoughts and feelings is because they are very confused right now. I think and feel so many different things about the poverty I am seeing and all these different things are often contradictory. They haven't come together in a nice, cohesive, easy to explain package.

First, there's the issue of recognizing my wealth in the face of this poverty. At home I don't consider myself wealthy at all. My family has worked so hard, and are still working so hard, to get us where we are. Compared to other Americans, we are middle class. Compared to the world though, we are so wealthy. We have a two-story house, with electricity, running water, and my brother and I each have a bedroom. That's average in the States, but here only the wealthy can afford those things.

I walk around with 20,000 shillings in my purse, which is about $15, and I pass people who haven't seen that kind of money in months. We come back to our guesthouse, with our electricity and our lap tops when there are so many people here that have never lived in a house with lights and will never even touch the keyboard of a computer. People here look at us the way we look at the sort of people who have a tennis court in their backyard, a personal cook, and an indoor pool.

Then there's the issue of realizing that not only am I wealthy, but I am a part of the reason these people are so poor. Because of the way I live, the things I buy, and because I am an American, I cause others to live in poverty. I learn more and more all the time about the ways I (we) cause others to live with less, and support the oppression that causes poverty. We buy clothes produced by sweatshops, where people work for wages they cannot live by. We eat food grown on farms labored by slaves. We support an economy that sustains itself largely at the expense of others. We say we don't support slavery or child labor but those beliefs seem only to apply to those in our own country.

People from the world's twenty wealthiest nations have an average family income of about $27,000 (We are certainly in this category), while the average family income of the twenty poorest nations is only a little over $2,000. The top 2% of the world possesses 50% of the world's wealth. Sorry, I'm a statistics person. The numbers speak though, and they say that the way things are right now is so wrong. We have so much when others have so little and there's no way it's justifiable.

What's the response to be? There's the tough question. There are so many tough questions I am asking myself. What would it look like to live justly? What needs to change so that we can honestly say we are living in a way that empowers, instead of uses, our brothers and sisters around the world? How much do we give, and to whom do we give? What is the best way to help people? How do we know which cause, of all noble causes, to fight for?

I have some answers to those questions and I know some of the ways I will respond. None of it is very satisfying though because I am seeing firsthand how big the problem of poverty is. It is disheartening to know that, even if I am doing my part, the problem will still be of epic proportions. At some points in time, I am overwhelmed by the power I do have as a rich American. Other times though, I am overwhelmed with feelings of powerlessness because there is so, so much wrong in this world. It's a very confusing thing to have such polar experiences, both of them equally intense.

These are just some of the things I am constantly thinking about here. If you know me well, you know that at home I have asked a lot of the same questions. It's all so much more prominent here though. And here, these questions are being paired with all sorts of other questions that I haven't got around to sharing with you yet--questions about faith and questions about what to do with my life. So, there's more to come...